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Thursday, July 1, 2021

My Poetry Friday Clunker

             Thanks to Laura Shovan who is hosting this Poetry Friday, at her blog, here.  She is sharing her poem that won honorable mention in a poetry contest, one of a monster and a woman unacknowledged for her creation. 

          I'm taking a break for the rest of the month, wishing each of you a July that means summertime is a season to love. I'll be back later in the summer. And also important, wishing you a great Independence Day celebration this weekend!

          Here's my response to Linda Mitchell's "clunker" ideas from last week. What fun it was writing some of my thoughts to "The price tag always lies." Thanks, Linda!


           Linda Mitchell’s clunker

 

The price tag always lies:

the way that model sways just enough

to show off the dress,

the one that will please

in an ocean breeze

but you end up in a gale;

the way a sale advertises

the best buy of all.

Then you realize

you don’t need, or want, 

or have enough to take 

that icing on the cake.

Words come with price tags, too.

Feelings inflate every price, 

whether you write or speak.

Keep them out of stock;

that’s the truth.

 

           Linda Baie ©

 



Free Stock photos by Vecteezy
at

15 comments:

  1. Linda MitchellJuly 2, 2021 at 4:52 AM

    WOW! I love this poem. The rhyme gives it the feel of a dress swaying. "that icing on the cake." made me smile. But the nice turn at the end gives some seriousness to this poem...all so true. "That's the truth." I wish I had written this poem. So glad this clunker shines new.

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  2. Carol VarsalonaJuly 2, 2021 at 8:23 AM

    "Words come with price tags, too." What a way to make an exit for a summer sojorn. You really sparked up the clunker line and made it a statement. Advice for all. Enjoy your July time with family and self. I am glad that you will be nurturing your summer soul, Linda. If you have a digital inspiration for this topic, I would love to share it at an upcoming mini-gallery. Stay cool!

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  3. Denise KrebsJuly 2, 2021 at 11:11 AM

    Linda, lovely poem with a good message. I love the connection to words having price tags. That makes me go down many thought paths...

    I really love the sound of these lines too:

    "...to show off the dress,
    the one that will please
    in an ocean breeze
    but you end up in a gale;
    the way a sale advertises..."

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  4. Margaret SimonJuly 2, 2021 at 11:38 AM

    Isn't that the truth? The sway of dresses seem to look like maternity clothes on me. I like how you end with a universal lesson for us all.

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  5. author amokJuly 2, 2021 at 3:22 PM

    Oh, boy. I'm feeling this today, Linda: "Words come with price tags, too./
    Feelings inflate every price." Have a wonderful break!

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  6. Michelle KoganJuly 2, 2021 at 4:04 PM

    What a clever poem Linda, filled with much wordplay. And your "word" ending is the creme de la creme, Yes,
    "Keep them out of stock;
    that’s the truth.

    Enjoy the 4th and month of July!

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  7. Max @ Completely Full BookshelfJuly 2, 2021 at 5:52 PM

    What a lovely poem!!! First of all, I love Mitchell's idea of exchanging "clunker" lines with other people so they can find a use for them in their own writing—I've definitely thought of great sentences that go nowhere, so this is so clever! And your poem is so pretty—the rhyme scheme is great, especially with some of those rhymes within lines, like "gale" and "sale" or "please," "breeze," and "need." And I love the themes, especially that about keeping words and feelings out of stock, and about those being what matters, not products and discounts. Enjoy the month of July (unless I see you on #IMWAYR), and thanks so much for the great poem!

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  8. Mary LeeJuly 3, 2021 at 7:02 AM

    I'm laughing about the lie of "the icing on the cake." SO MANY of my cakes have had flaws covered by icing. And yet we use that phrase to denote the best of the best. What a lie. And yet...the cake is yummy...so maybe the "icing on the cake" can denote kintsugi rather than a superlative. Hmm...

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  9. ElisabethJuly 3, 2021 at 7:29 AM

    This is lovely! Such fun and yet also thought-provoking. I love how the rhythm and rhyme of this poem just pulls you along, and how much impact the pivot to feelings instead of things has at the end.

    How fun to see how one person's clunker can be another person's inspiration!

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  10. Randomly ReadingJuly 3, 2021 at 8:17 AM

    This is a fun poem with lots of truth to it. Thanks for sharing it. I hope you have a wonderful time off and enjoy the summer with your grandkids and others doing fun things.

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  11. jlcjbuzzJuly 3, 2021 at 12:37 PM

    This was so fun! Price tags do lie and you captured how in a priceless way! LOL. Thanks for sharing your clunker inspired poem! I wish you a wonderful period of relaxation during July! Enjoy this beautiful month!

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  12. Linda BJuly 3, 2021 at 2:36 PM

    Thanks to everyone for enjoying my poem. I love reading the varied responses. Whether "clunker" or not, the line brought different ideas to you, & of course for me, too. Happy July!

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  13. mbhmaineJuly 3, 2021 at 6:54 PM

    Way to take a clunker and run with it! You've created a great poem here! Enjoy your month of relaxation!

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  14. Catherine FlynnJuly 5, 2021 at 4:26 AM

    Well done, Linda! I love the truth of your final lines. Have a restful month!

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